And this is EXACTLY why I don’t let dogs lick my face…

Also, this is exactly why I don’t run a daycare. Well, one of many reasons.

Norah was at daycare today. Mark is working a 1-9 shift, so my dear niece got packed off to Cori’s house. She’s usually OK with it; she cries a lot if mom is home, because she’d rather stay home (obviously- who wouldn’t?), but she’s fine by the time they get there, and she has a great time.

Today, though, she cried for a few hours after Mark dropped her off. Than (according to Cori), she made a poop “twoce the size of her head.” Norah doesn’t have a huge head, but eeeewwww. At least she made it to the toilet… that time. She seemed to feel better after that, anyway.

Then she started crying again later… and she didn’t make it to the toilet. She made another one all over the kitchen floor. Cori went to run a bath for her, and by the time she got back to clean up the mess, one of her St. Bernards had done it for her. No more mess. Thanks, Rover.

I mean, really. I can deal with my own kids’ poop (usually), but I can’t handle it from Other People’s Kids. So I guess I’d be happy if someone else cleaned it up for me… but SICK! The dog ATE THE POO. This further strengthens my belief that dogs are, in fact, gross. They are many other things, too (sometimes adorable, often very affectionate), but they’re gross.

AJ had a dog when we got married. I could tell you lots of stories about this dog, but all you need to know for now (and you really don’t want to, but I’m going to tell you, anyway) is that she ate her own crap. And she didn’t just eat it. No, she liked it frozen. She’d go outside in the winter, do her business, and come back inside, and about an hour later she’d ask to go out again so she could eat her poopsicle. Premeditated coprophagy. Nasty.

Even dogs who don’t eat their own poo (that you know of, anyway) lick their own asses. Now, I know that this is a necessity, as they don’t have toilet paper. Cats do it, too. But cats don’t generally then go and lick people’s faces. And no, it’s not true that a dog’s mouth has some kind of magical antiseptic properties that make it “cleaner than a person’s mouth”- see  (among other sources)

In conclusion, dogs are gross, and no, I’m not available to babysit this weekend.


1 Comment

  1. Carrie said,

    October 10, 2008 at 8:30 am

    Ewwwwwwwwww. I’m gagging, now!

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